Stop, Think.

Ok, we all have those moments where something comes out of your mouth and everyone goes into awkward silence mode. “Did you really just say that?” gets mouthed as some point, or everyone laughs to alleviate how quiet it just got.

I do this all the time, most memorably with the opposite sex. As someone who dwells on his stupidity and possible stupidity, these stick in my head and I remember them quite vividly. This is a small list of some of the stupider things I’ve said. Some are a bit assholey, but it really isn’t the intention desired at the time.

1. “You know what, your chin is really shiny.” – I was overly honest to my female friend. I’ve learned.
2. “Oh man I’m really going to regret having sex with you when I sober up.” – Yes I really did say that. For the record I didn’t mean it.
3. “Do you or your cleavage want to hit or stand on fifteen?” –  Said during blackjack school to get a trainees attention while her head was in the clouds. Overly effective.
4. ‘”You DO seem easy.” – A general comment to this flirty girl who was talking about hooking up.

Ok I know that was only four, but it’s really hard to find events that can be transcribed on here in a way that makes sense. ANYWAY! If you have your own moments like that to share, or if you’re a girl I’ve wronged in this way, please share what happened in the comments.